The Timey-Wimey Detector: March 2011

OKAY.

IF CAPITAL LETTERS DISTURB YOU, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER BECAUSE THIS POST WILL BE COMPLETELY FUCKING FULL OF CAPITAL LETTERS.

ALSO DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU ARE DISTURBED BY SWEARING,

EXCESSIVE FANGIRLING,

RANDOM THEORIES,

AND INARTICULATE KEYBOARD-MASHING.

NOW THAT I'VE LOST ALL FIVE OF MY READERS, LET'S BEGIN.

SHOT-BY-SHOT

ALTHOUGH NOT REALLY SHOT-BY-SHOT BECAUSE THERE ARE TOO MANY GODDAMN SHOTS FULL OF TOO MANY GODDAMN THINGS

ALSO SPOILERS, SO WATCH THE GODDAMN TRAILER FIRST

FIRST:


HELLO DOCTOR WITH A BEARD

DOES ANYONE HERE THINK MATT SMITH LOOKS MUCH SEXIER WITH A BEARD

BECAUSE I DO

HELLO MATT SMITH WITH A BEARD

FUCK YEAH

I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS, BUT LIKE, NOT IN A CREEPY "I'M-GONNA-MAKE-WEIRD-EROTIC-FANFICTION" WAY. HIS SEXUAL CHEMISTRY WITH HER IS FAR MORE THAN TEN'S EVER WAS, THOUGH TO BE FAIR TEN AND RIVER NEVER HAD MUCH SCREEN TIME TOGETHER. I'M SERIOUSLY SO EXCITED RIGHT NOW. SHE MAKES A REALLY GOOD PARTNER FOR HIM. BUT KNOWING MOFF THIS KISS/ROMANCE IS GONNA BE A HELL OF A LOT MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT.

ALSO, SHE CANNOT BE HIS DAUGHTER/MOTHER NOW, NO WAY NO HOW.

YOU ALL KNOW WHO I THINK SHE IS, SO I DON'T HAVE TO SAY IT AGAIN.

FAVOURITE ELEVEN PICTURE? I THINK SO

COULD THIS HAVE TO DO WITH THE IMPOSSIBLE ASTRONAUT BY ANY CHANCE

FUCK YEAH, PIRATES

PIRATES MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER, EVEN SOMETHING THAT CANNOT POSSIBLY GET ANY BETTER, AKA DOCTOR WHO

IT IS LIKE A THEORETICAL MATHEMATICAL FORMULA OF INFINITE BETTER-NESS

OKAY THAT MADE ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE

WHATEVER

FUCK YEAH, PIRATES

AHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"I'VE KILLED ALL OF THEM"

THAT IS A PRETTY BADASS LINE AND I REALLY HOPE HE'S DELIVERING IT TO AN ENEMY WHO'S WORTHY OF SUCH BADASSERY. AKA, I HOPE HE'S TALKING TO THE MASTER HERE. IS IT A COMPLETE PIPE DREAM TO THINK THAT THE MASTER COULD COME BACK? MAYBE. BUT I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HIS CHARACTER AND I THINK THAT IF ANYONE COULD RESCUE THE MASTER FROM RTD'S INADEQUATE TREATMENT, IT WOULD BE MOFFAT.


OH MY GOD

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE TO ME?

IT LOOKS LIKE TEN'S TARDIS.

TEN'S FUCKING TARDIS.

ALSDJF;LSJDFFFF

ALSO, I BELIEVE THIS COULD VERY WELL BE THE TARDIS FROM THE LODGER.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

MOFFAT, STOP MAKING ME SHIT MY PANTS, I JUST DID LAUNDRY.

AMY GET YOUR GUN

POINTS TO ANYONE WHO SEES THE REALLY BAD MUSICAL THEATRE REFERENCE I JUST MADE IN THAT CAPTION. ALSO, THIS IS OBVIOUSLY FOR SHOCK PURPOSES - YOU HEAR A GUNSHOT, YOU SEE AMY'S HAND STRETCHED OUT, YOU SEE THE DOCTOR YELL. HAS SHE ACTUALLY SHOT HIM? MAYBE. IS HE GONNA DIE? PROBABLY NOT. BUT STILL, IT'S AN EXCELLENT WAY TO END THE TRAILER.

okay i'm tired of capital letters now. sorry if you felt i was shouting at you. here are a bunch of lowercase letters to calm everything down, and also a pretty funny tweet exchange that popped up on my timeline today:

these people make my heart happy, even if they make me shit my britches at the same time.

twenty-four days.

i am having a premiere party and baking a dalek cake. what are you doing?

If you haven't already, WATCH THIS NOW.

If you're weird and didn't watch that immediately, then don't read here because there are SPOILERS:

Thoughts

1). Does anyone else think the President sounds hilarious? It's like they took every stereotype imaginable of The American President and rolled them all into one very badly-accented man. "Okay...you've got to sound like Nixon in Dick. And be as thick as the President from Love Actually. But...with a more gravelly tone." I would have laughed if I hadn't been shitting my pants.

2). Bloody children. Jesus, Moffat. It's always the bloody children. "I found my mummy! She's right behind you."

3). The Silent was next to him, not behind him. Aha! DOES THAT MEAN SOMETHING?! No? Oh. Okay then.

4). I can't fucking wait.